Posts Tagged ‘Domestic violence’

Abbie Smith is a female scientist, and she is being bullied. By other women.

Do you like science?  Want to do a fun, easy social science experiment?  Your Yahoo search engine must be set to auto complete in order to do this.

1) Go to Yahoo. 2)  type in the words resources for women. 3) stop. 4) read through all the entries. Are there any resources for women?  Write down your answer.

Now, repeat that experiment, but at point number 4, type in the word men instead. Write down your answer. What did you find?*

Imagine if you were being bullied by a woman or a girl?  Statistics tell us that it is far more common than you think, and women are far more creative when they bully. Well, the same result is even more true for men trapped in domestic violence situations.

Women bully people all the time, and right now, Ms. Smith, a  blogger who writes about viruses, vaccines and HIV is under attack by some other bloggers who call themselves feminists.  Most of the bullies, trolls, and the worst of those calling for boycotts and censorship are women, but there are a few manginas, with vagendas  involved as well.

Stop by http://scienceblogs.com/ERV and lend your support to fight female bullies.

Dear-Abby

Abigail Van Buren say's NO to female bullies. Dear Abbie advises us to "run!"when we are stuck in the presence of violent women. But I ask: what if there is nowhere else to go?

WE know there is next to zero social support for men or boys who are being abused and bullied by women–so where do women go when they are abused by women?

Dear Abby, alone, is not enough to stop female bullying.

———————————–

Big Man Abused By Girlfriend Fights To Turn The Other Cheek

By Abigail Van Buren | Dear Abby – 10/19/2011

DEAR ABBY: I have been dating “Carmen” for a few years, but in the last year she has started becoming violent when we are having an argument. I think this is domestic abuse, but she claims it isn’t because I’m a man.

I’m not someone who can take abuse without repercussions. I’m like a mirror. If someone brings violence into my life, I reflect it back on them. So far, I have restrained my instincts — but eventually I know Carmen will cross the line and I’m going to snap. I have the potential to hurt her badly.

I have tried everything to make Carmen understand how I feel, but she continues to insist it doesn’t matter because I’m so much bigger and stronger than she is. When she hits me, it doesn’t hurt physically, but the anger I feel is indescribable. I’m at the end of my rope and considering breaking up with her before I hurt her.

I don’t want to end the relationship, but I think it’s the only way to make her see things from my perspective. Or should I call the cops the next time she hits me? — BRUISED AND ABUSED BOYFRIEND
——————————————————————————————————-

Men are abused by women all the time, and there is NOWHERE for them to go when things get out of control. Men are taught that women don’t do these things, and if they do, to shut up about it. Fortunately, there is Abigail Van Buren–but that’s about it--unless you are willing to defend yourself.


For more on Dear Abby’s response to the letter above, go here

*If your results are anything like mine, almost all of your results for men returned some form of phrase that inferred mental illness, or some other thing that infers mental issues?

Your results for women returned “women in leadership, business, entrepreneurs, web design, women and children, etc” and every other sort of opportunity. What does that tell you about language? What does that tell you about words, and Yahoo? And what does that tell you about resources for men?

And what does that tell you about “social engineering?” Repeat the experiment with Google. Have fun!


Related articles

Regions of the brain affected by PTSD and stress.

This is your brain on PTSD

[This happened last night actually. It takes time to reflect on such events. Read this as if it is happening, because these are my thoughts immediately after the event]

I was physically assaulted less than two hours ago and I did not report it to the police.  Is that a bad thing? I guess it depends on who engenders the dialogue…It depends on what I look like, compared to my perpetrator.

And hitting back is never an option if you are male–you just learn to take it–long after the fear of violence leaves your body, anger sets in, and then the numbness, and then the matrix of contradictions about women’s violence against men and children–and men who  were once children. Then depression.

But from my literal, lifetime of  experience, men who call the police are as likely as their perpetrator to get hauled off to jail, because violence against men is du jour, and profitable one way or the other to the police and state court systems, as well as to women’s organizations that depend on minimizing and marginalizing  this topic.

Men who break the norms, and the rules of being violated or bullied by women are a bigger threat to society than men who just shut up, and take it “like a man, “because shouldering the violence of America has always been a male burden, and always has been expected of us.

I spent over fifteen years employed in, or owning businesses, that were a cultural anthropologists dream of opportunities to observe situational violence, and served as training grounds for violent women to get away with violent crimes.

Then something kicked in: I had had enough of violence. It is a toxic poison that creeps into the center of you, and seeps out in all the wrong places.

But before I get all rhetorical, here are the facts of my assault, two hours ago:

1) I was walking home from a bar–not drunk, but buzzed enough to sleep. I like a few beers to calm recurrent PTSD, and I like to walk at late at night. But I am always prepared for violence.

2) I walked from the bar clutching a prime cut of flank steak, rare, nestled into a bed of fried yam fries. I looked forward to finishing my meal at home, over a cold one.

3) I walked one block towards home, and quickly noted the sound of loud voices. Loud voices are not uncommon at this time of night, but loud female voices, raucous, and ‘distressed’ in that way that females can get–all worked up over comments about hair or something.

4) I pulled my large canister of pepper spray out of my side pocket, and hid it in my hand, knowing full well that violent women travel in packs, and always have violent men beside them. I proceeded forwards at my green light.

Raucous womens voices late at night are very common, and almost always charged with violent or sexual energy. As a male, and trained to the sound of ‘women in distress‘ as most males are, I recognized one distinct female voice and then another–parties to the conflict, it turns out.

In my years of experience, the loudest females are usually capable of initiating the most violence,and their will to violent rhetoric is almost always a signal to actual violence to come–that violence which sucks others in.

Their vocal ranges were beyond ordinary, and obviating my caution.’

5) I proceeeded forwards, and encountered a large diverse group of males and females outside a bar. That bar, my memory told me is one that I recognized as being a former ‘hillbilly stomping ground’ or, a bar that was once predominantly full of white people

6) That bar is currently a  ‘wigger/nigger bar’ where everyone of all races calls each other nigger. “Wusup myNigga”,” Yo Nigga,” “You my nigga?” and so forth. Make of that what you will.

7) I paused ten or fifteen feet from the site of the violence, and looked at my options. People were flowing from the bar to the street. My experience has taught me that the Laden principle of street crossing does not apply for men at all, for various reasons too much to go into here, with this being one of the more extreme examples of what happens to men who disobey the rules [here]

So, engendered male, my options of walking around the violence were as good as my options walking through the violence–side note: if you have never been around violence, good for you. Stop reading here. You deserve a nice life, with your head tucked firmly up your privileged ass, and nice, fresh  clean, cloudlike white diapers every day!!

I grew up in the most extreme violence, and spent years climbing out of it, with varied success.

But I have never been so fortunate, and I have never been sheltered or or protected by any law, or entity, ever. So here is my reasoning during that moment.
a) walk around the violence–which had alreadyspread into the street, which meant waiting for a stoplight. If I immediatyely extricated myself, and walked across the street despite a contradictory stoplight, I could face police violence–which is always more scary that crowd violence.

b) walk through the violence at an opportune moment. An opportune moment is one wherein ‘friendly’ members of a mob recognize me, and my face as a face unaffiliated with that mob violence, and let me “pass”. This is a common occurence when an out-group member encounters in-group violence. ( Anthropology 101?).

c) wait till the violence passes, in which case I might become a witness to the violence, implicated in the violence, and also a further victim via police line-ups, witness statements, and other dirty cop tactics of social control/police authority–like arresting people who refuse to participate in the charade of informing the good officers what happened.

WWJD? What Would Jew Do? What do the good atheists and the good skeptics and humanists have to say?

I won’t wait long to hear that all violence is perpetrated by men, etc etc, ad nauseum.

Nor will I wait in telling you what I did: I walked gingerly through the violence as I have attempted all my life, but only after I had made eye contact and shared facial expressions with members of the crowd who seemed to be relatively detached from the violence– like rolling my eyes, and signifying that such violence is ‘NOT any business of mine’, eye to eye with what appeared to be the most sober, humored people in that crowd.

But what was that violence, you ask?  Who were the violent people in the crowd? And what was my assault? What were the dirty bits?

I will tell you: after my WWJD moment passed, and I was affirmatively nodded through the crowd by seemingly detached participant A -a white male in Wigger gear, and participant B-a mixed female in college age clothes–I walked on by in the path that cleared like a parted Red Sea…

At which point the combatants–who had been pulled apart just before my entry–re-converged.

Two tall (5’10-11″), relatively attractive mixed and or black females, who had been pushed away from each other, lunged at each other, from 10 feet away, and despite being yelled at to calm down, insisted on throwing punches over the shoulders of their referees who were trying to hold them back.

And that is where the shit got funny.

Imagine now, girl A and girl B, and Guy A:

As I passed Girl A on my right–who was being pushed out of the conflict by Guy A–she began to punch guy A in the face; at which point, he gave her a hard shove in the center of her chest and told her to knock it off. She responded with full fingernails and fists in his face, and then, backing off, said

” I’ve already called 911.”  That, in my experience, has been  what any 911 call looks like anyways–some woman who digs a shitter deep hole with her violence, and THEN calls the cops FIRST. Female bullies always call the cops when they are about to get their asses kicked for what they do. ( ANOTHER STORY)

Needless to say, I moved forwards, past her, and out of range–or so I thought.

Having passed, as I turned to look back at woman A) AND THE MAN SHE WAS PUNCHING–and  I was punched squarely in my right kidney by combatant number two, Girl B, from out of nowhere.

Like a Myriam, not turned to a pillar of salt nearly, but definitely a man who was punched with a boxers rib jab by yet another woman, I was cowed, and gasped–my kidneys are my weak point, as I have only one, and I haven’t done a boxers sit-up in years!

Then, she rushed by me, slightly looking over her shoulder in my direction, made eye contact, and then hurled forwards towards girl A.

Ouch, I thought in that moment. My bad kidney!-my only kidney,  in the shape of a horshoe by defect of birth. I have no idea why she socked me there–a complete stranger hit my weak spot!! But I am aware that any good boxer knows the sheer value of a kidney shot can take an opponent out quicker than a good hook to the jaw.

Women seem to know your weak spots, and go for them by rote. I have learned that through a lifetime of being assaulted by women, and wondered if she had a brother who might have taught her the value of that shot; I actually marveled at her punching power!

And it got even weirder–I noticed her strong long legs going up to her ass like pillars; I refelcted on the years and years of knowing women’s violence first hand, that if I worked the game and acted a victim--I could probably even use that card to work my way into the crowd, and win approval as a victim–maybe even hook up with her at some point because ‘she owed me’ something–an apology.

I watched this sort of bar violence, and bar politics for years on end, enough to know its system, and work it.

Such is the perverse nature of enduring women’s violence.Now, I had to pause, and reflect–and also salaciously admire–these two comely
warriors that I had been caught in the middle of.  I also instantly recognized the value of my life experience–the value of knowing that most people–and certainly most white women– could not be so lucky to see what I have seen about women in general, and women’s violence in particular.

But women are egregiously violent, and more so when drinking.  And white people in general–detached as they are from the primal heirarchy, and reality in general–they don’t see or acknowledge it because they refuse to look–it scares them. It is a discussion that needs tobe had.

And most white violence takes rhetorical forms, and hides itself behind police and state structures.

They employ victim narratives that disadvantage some at the expense of others–white peoples violence is systemic, inappropriately examined, and malevolently applied via social tropes, and stereotyopes that uphold social orders, even while perpetrating violence elsewhere. The white power structure is not a valid representation of reality–but it works well  as a system of social control, and as  system of capital formation and  taxation.

Put another way, that system relies on lies, rather than truths to sell itself to you.

And white peoples choices to systemically refuse to discuss violence perpetrated by women? White culture decisions to marginalize stories of womens violence? That is the grease in the gears of such as system of social control.

Wanna’ know  the main tool of controlling boys, or turning them into state sponsored homicidal maniacs?

Tell the boys “never ever hit girls.” And doubly damn the boy who would sock her back–all social mechanisms are designed to uphold this sort of female violence.

This was a painful, lunacy-worthy lesson in contradiction for me most of my life: being bullied, and battered by girls and women from infancy into adulthood. But it’s there, and it’s real. My kidney will tell you that tomorrow.

Now here’s the really, really fucked up part–the really demented part–about the specific, and differential effects of women’s violence against people in general, and men, specifically, AND ME THREE HOURS AGO, that sits in my craw: despite having been assaulted by a complete stranger; and despite a crowd of witnesses seeing it–seeing me, a mere passing stranger– being literally punched in my back! by a woman I have never known–is unthinkably wrong, unspeakably demented–and strangely, according to girl/boy politics–acceptable to my society!!

If I were to call it in as an assault against my person, there is no doubt in my mind that I would be brought into a jail, or a mental institution–because womens violence is condoned, encouraged, accepted, and validated by police culture, and society at large. Any member of team female violence would no doubt concoct some derailing minimalization of that woman’s violence against me.

And, as those things most certainly always work out, the officer on the scene–being a fem-trained dolt, woul say ” Well, I gotta bring one a yuh in, or both of yuh,” because police are trained like everyone else to conceive of women as “victums of mail viuhlince,” despite decades of studies to the contrary.

It blows my mind.

I had been “tapped” by that violent female as a potential ally, witness or partner in her crimes of violence; and by my experience, and by inference, as a potential sexual partner by my willingness to “protect her” should the police actually come, or she loses her shit too deep in some trouble she started, or chose to participate in.

Or maybe, I was merely assaulted, again.

And after a lifetime of enduring women’s villence, i know it quite well. Sounds strange, doesn’t it? Sounds like Stockholm Syndrome, or trauma based bonding, right? Learn to love women, learn to love women’s violence.

But see, it was ME, engendered male, and well aware of such a discrepancy within my culture–many men would kill to be her hero in that moment (and I have not discussed the males in this crowd at all), who wasn’t about to have any part in it.

That I had endured random female violence from her out of nowhere was a gift, so the rhetoric says–lucky me, another chance to NOT open my mouth and condone it, or open my mouth like a playa’, and discuss my sexual opportunity! A chance to be a hero!

See, the trick with female violence is that they are daring you to ask for an apology–and on that basis they decide if you are a “good man or a bad man.”

Upholders of female violence are hero’s in a fascist culture–becuz theres always bigger trouble ahead in a fascist world full of perpetual war, and perpetual victims.

Sad, but true: women’s violence against men–and men remaining complicit through silence–is what encourages further acts of violence. Violence and stress caused by violence has a cumulative effect and it begins in childhood.[ .pdf here]

Story of my life–literally. Women tapping out of the battles they get themselves into–me ‘saving them’, really, from their own violence.

My reward? Pussy in my face–if I play my cards right…but is that really a reward? I don’t think so–because I realize that every woman I cover for could well be using that violence against children–and, if so, she needs to be stopped.

I wish my father was so wise….

And women’s violence against men and children–It has to stop being taken lightly.

Sadly, I do not have it in me to do what white women have been doing for years, and getting away with: I will not call the police; I will not call my mother (she’s been dead for over a decade now); and I will not relegate that anonymous woman’s violence into the realm of imprisonable deviance–because I know, and expect, that women are, and always will be violent.

What I WILL do is open the door to discussions about women’s violence, and open my ears as well to how we can solve this cyclical, circular problem. The only thing I know for sure about four hours ago? Not one man threw a punch at anyone, while two women duked it out, and over twenty bystanders looked on.

But no one did anything but laugh at that punch to my sole kidney. Not a damn one–even me. I will wait, and listen, if anyone has suggestions.
But the simple truth is, women who abuse, abuse those furthest from having an immediate voice in their rhetoric of violence–and the least power in any situation of women’s violence–and their victims seldom prosecute.

As the threat of police coming was in the air, the crowd pulled it’s consecutive heroine’s apart, and enabled them into the safety of running automobiles, and hurried away from the scene of their crimes.

The girl who struck me, looked at me and smiled sheepishly as she was ushered past me–and then she turned, and began to yell at her co-conspirator who drove her away ” I would have killed that bitch…”

Have you heard of the battle between Jan Kruska and Petra Luna? Call me late to the game, but then again, the effects of women’s violence didn’t affect me until recently. Their story is old news, but it fits my thesis. I bumped into it when I was researching cyber-bullying and slander.

Jan and Petra are both caught up in the resurgence of the sex-negative/ sex positive movement, although they might not know it yet. As far as I can tell, they are the working class version of the academic porn wars that are waged today across the blogosphere.  They are also part of the problem in allowing women’s dialogues to go unheard–or put another way–we need to listen closer to women’s dialogues.

This battle gives us a glimpse of the sort of violence that women wage against each other, against children, and the sexual nature of those battles.

Jan was convicted some years ago of having sex with a teen-aged boy, so she became an advocate for her own causesex-offender registration. Petra is a vigilante who has declared a sort of mission to combat Jan’s mission . She is a Men’s Rights advocate with an organization devoted to helping men escape relationship, and women’s violence. I am no fan of MRA’s in general,  but I am an ardent advocate for the prosecution of female pedophiles at every single opportunity.

I can smell them a mile away--I have the same magical powers sniffing out female pedophiles that gender fems have sniffing out rapists— I also believe in equality, and so, I believe that men should have resources devoted to stopping violence against men and boys. But not devoted to religious vigilantes like Petra.

Politics makes strange bedfellows. Petra has threatened, bullied, and harassed Jan online . And here is Jan’s response to the harrassment.(be careful not to get your eye poked out by that wild 80’s up-do).

I am by default, solidly against bullying, and I will not be bullied either. Who did what first? Always them: I keep records.

Patada

That's NOT a hacky sack!

But still, some feminists, and some in the LGBT/TS communities are often surprisingly silent about such harassment of women by women, much less men–they are first and foremost sworn to keep secrets, apparently. I also suspect that being vocal or truthful on the wider issues jeopardizes their identity somehow…

You can watch for yourself, and call your own shots in the battle. It’s been going on forever. When the issue is the abuse of children by women, most of the allied pro-woman community are dead silent. This reveals the extent of some women’s self righteousness in harassing and labeling others, at the expense of truth, or justice, as well as where such dialogues are headed–the sliding scale–the filtering–of women’s truth to the wider audience, about women’s violence against each other, and children.

I suspect that at the root of such dialogues there are many secrets, one woman to the next, that have nothing to do with men or patriarchy, and these secrets shared between women are what create rapists and other ‘criminals.’

But no one wants to look at that yet–there’s just too much money to be made kicking straw-men in the balls all the time, and forming organizations and getting ‘funding’ by keeping that dialogue quiet right now.

Related articles

On the surface, the article seems to appeal to all people, in an almost egalitarian manner, despite the fact that it just a snapshot in time, from one locality. And of course, it is a selective example wherein not only do women appear to be greater in ‘victimhood’ but also it compares the existing notions and false presumption (women are victims of DV at greater rates than men) against the facts of DV ( Fiebert’s careful three decade study of DV on initiation and follow through of women’s violence directed at men.)

In brutally simple terms, homicide is a statistical outlier—an extreme that is almost not worth noting.

Now, the facts: in this one study of deaths caused by DV, men lose, clearly, in the common imagination of the layperson, because obviously, more women died in this example. The author then goes on to break down the examples and we find that—surprise!—the men who killed women were abusers, and the women who killed men were no doubt driven to it, by being egregiously abused, while many men also killed themselves ( hot topic in feminist rhetoric ‘men kill themselves to hurt women’—new lows in the debate, while other feminists take a pro-active stance acknowledging that men’s suicide rates are a serious topic…).

What is missing in this particular snapshot is that we have to imagine what could drive a man to murder—and we do not impute males with the same propensity to kill a mate with long term abuse suffered by those males. But enough about this snapshot- one of millions out there that attempt to circumvent the issue of aggression with extreme examples—where are the facts in practice as documented by Fiebert?

Here is what comes next, after the article, when the comments begin:

Notice how the women first ask for a particular male; then, bait the hook—as if men are prey– female two says “wait for it…” as if men are out there somewhere, just dying to hear such dismissive rhetoric—that rhetoric inscribed upon male bodies by women’s lifelong deliberate denial of male awareness of the female voice and it’s impending violence, such as Fiebert has had all along, but which seldom get attention because they are facts, not vitriol, or passive aggressive verbal violence directed at one particular sex.

This style of communication, by definition, is aggressive.

The question the author asks is itself a cloaked threat against men, asking not ‘what can we do about violence,’ but rather, implying that men are the cause of “their own” violence, and then aggressively attempting to provoke an equally aggressive reaction, while neatly overlooking the percentage of men killed by other men that women brought into their lives in the form of boyfriends, police powers, and social workers—a form of institutionalized violence that women do not face.

The example above IS an example of aggression by definition, and an example of the typical aggressive female to male gender-baiting that occurs all over America, every day; it is also an example of the third category of porn: academic porn; semi-informed, or semi interested perspectives about serious issues that masquerade as facts, while dismissing academic empirical evidence that contests the purportedly academic positions.

But what about this one snapshot example that actually examines aggression, and death caused by the dictionary definition of aggression? Not much of it. This study examines one example of homicide—and curiously minimizes the use by women of third parties to enable homicide of males, via boyfriends, and the police. It has virtually no intent other than to victimize males with statistical snapshots, and does nothing to address female aggression against males. It is one more form of gender warporn, and its net effect is to further violence.

The academic appeal is directed in the form that is dummied down and directed at those who do not have access to the entirety of a discussion( in this case the gender based, and separatist feminist based, deconstructionist and quasi-liberal, police infrastructure, and biased opinions about what constitute acts of aggression).

In other words, an early casualty of the debate about domestic violence was the simple facts that women commit many acts of violence in relationships, as Fieberts statistics clearly show.

Acts of aggression can be anything from the person at the grocery store parking their car with its bumper touching yours, to the guy on the bus who sits down without asking, and loudly blares his Ipod; to the person who insults you or demeans you on a daily basis, or the woman who reminds you how quickly the police or her other boyfriend will come if she calls them, no matter what she did to you.

Acts of aggression can also be women depending upon men to not speak up in a relationship when women verbally, sexually, or physically threaten them; or depend on other men to perpetuate the cycle of and by the time a man wakes up in such a situation, it is usually too late.

The best part about these academic websites that prostitute objectivity? They almost always seem to end their threads on the exact note they want, like orchestrated missives to half-wits. This post ended, predictably, with some woman upholding some man who died protecting the right of women to hide their violence behind violent men who protect ‘her’ children—and I don’t have the time to unpack that baggage right now. But last time I checked, we were not chimpanzees.

Men die more often when women use other men to fight battles that women start.

*Sage is a linguistic dictionary, based on WordNet http://wordnet.princeton.edu/ It is based on how English speakers actually use the language, and is NOT to be used to determine what the “correct” or “incorrect” use of the English language is, because political and social trends are fickle, financed, and flawed, whereas the democratic use of language, and common peoples understanding of that language, is democracy in action.

** SUMMARY:  The collection is entitled REFERENCES EXAMINING ASSAULTS BY WOMEN ON THEIR SPOUSES OR MALE PARTNERS: AN ANNOTATED BIBLIOGRAPHY. This bibliography examines 282 scholarly investigations: 218 empirical studies and 64 reviews and/or analyses, which demonstrate that women are as physically aggressive, or more aggressive, than men in their relationships with their spouses or male partners.  The aggregate sample size in the reviewed studies exceeds 369,800.

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For anyone who is not an academic, ‘school educated person’, here is what I am saying above the non-arbitrary line above you.

Book smart people use the discussion about domestic violence to put more police in your neighborhoods, while keeping you out of their neighborhoods. Academics are people who have college degrees, and write stuff and try to get paid for what they write. What they write is funded-financed—by saying the right things to the government in order to get a paycheck from the government.

These people make a ton of money by talking about how women are abused, and by not talking about how men are abused. And they all hate Jerry Springer.

Remember Jerry Springer, and all those violent women? At least he showed us the truth about women who your man goes to when you are pregnant, because talking to each other about sex isn’t something we are taught to do, and prostitution isn’t legal in America.

Women who hit men, and children; and women who cheat, and then call the police to look like victims are all on Jerry Springer, but the book smart people hate him.

Remember all those women who had babies by a bunch of men? Do you ever wonder why your man doesn’t come home? And when he does do you want to just kill him? The girl on Springer is the one who used your man to get a piece of his paycheck, just like academics get government money. All of us get used by them when they don’t tell the truth.

Do you sometimes want to smack your woman upside her head because she spent two hours talking to the guy at the Waffle House? It’s probably because you don’t have anyone to talk to, because some people like you actually work for a living, and book smart people use words that could put you in jail, where they should be.

But simply put, many women make money by accusing men of crimes, and other women don’t talk about it. Lots of people beat each other up; but only men go to jail for it—because the people who write books about violence get money when they only talk about mens violence. And the cops and academics and social workers are all off fucking each other while your local main street is eaten up by Walmart.

They don’t give a shit about you, and they use the troubles that men and women have in relationships to make money.

So, if you need help in a violent situation, here is a number you can call 1-800-EAT-SHIT, because they are not here to help you.